And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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