I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
