k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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