I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
