I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
So apparently I’m into choking now
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