dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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