yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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