If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
