Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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