party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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