We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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