great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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