One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
