Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize
