A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
