My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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