also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
