Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
