i permit you to call me
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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