her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
