tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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