I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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