Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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