careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
