He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
