I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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