what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
