Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Randomize
