Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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