So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
