u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
