She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize