why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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