I must be too annoying 4 u.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
