I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
