Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
