My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize