there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize