is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
