At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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