Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize