Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize