you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
