I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
