Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
So apparently I’m into choking now
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize