any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
