have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Randomize
