Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
that may or may not have been my penis.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
