check it out our google latitudes are spooning
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
