a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Everyone says I win the strip club
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
